4:45 am at the Kim home.

October 15, 2013

This is an account that will probably be boring to anyone who is not JE, Ian, or myself.  Or our parents.  No, I take that back.  My dad will get bored.  Dad, don’t read this.  It will bore you.  But I’m writing this out so I don’t forget the lesson in it. :]

Ian has been waking up consistently around 5 am every morning because of an alarm, because of noise, because of some disturbance or another.  And I’ve been worried about it training him to wake at that hour.  So we’ve gone to extremes (read: I’ve truly been a bossyhead) to keep noise levels minimal in the morning.  White noise machine on.  Phones and alarms under our pillows.  Clothes set out the night before.  Walking slowly on the balls of our feet so the floor doesn’t creak and so we can sneak by Ian’s crib without stirring him.

Baby sleep idolatry at its (un)finest.

4:45 am this morning, I hear a high pitch chirp!  I’m immediately awake.  I listen, don’t hear it again, hear Ian’s easy breathing, and start to drift off to sleep agai … chirp!  This time, I tap JE and whisper, “Do you hear that?  I think it’s the smoke detector’s battery.”  JE stumbles out of bed.  “Shh!” I whisper.  He goes outside to investigate.  Chirp!  Ian’s doing leg lifts by now.  Meanwhile, chirp!  Long pause.  Chirp!

Noises outside the room.  I go outside to ask JE to investigate more quietly. Chirp!  “It’s the carbon monoxide detector!  Low battery!”

JE has his headlamp on and goes back in the room, looking for the detector.  Chirp!  “Turn off the light!”  JE turns it off and looks for the carbon monoxide detector in the dark.  Thud.  Tink.  “Shh!”  Chirp!  Ian is looking at all our crazy activity by now.  I’m burying my head in my hands.

Finally JE finds it and takes the battery out.  I look for the bathroom in the dark.  When I come back in the room, JE is wrestling a blanket from Ian’s hands and — from my perspective — “overstimulating” the baby.  I pull JE away from the crib.

We get back into bed.  Ian is playing in his crib.  5:00 am.

I’m rubbing my face with frustration.  JE is falling asleep already.  I hear more leg lifts from Ian’s side of the room.  And occasional “anyone there? come feed me and play with me!” sounds.

And as I lie in bed, tired but so frustrated and disgusting-hearted that I can’t sleep, it occurs to me: there’s no one to blame about that battery just happening to get low enough to set off the chirping at 4:45 in the morning today … except perhaps God’s sovereign sense of humor and timing.

5:25 am.  I ask JE for forgiveness for being so mean to him.  As if he set it off.  He’s loving and quick to forgive.  I quickly feed Ian and go back to sleep.  Kind of.

Later that morning, JE and I laugh about it.  Seriously?  The night we decide to go to extreme measures to create the perfect sleep-past-5-am environment for Ian, the carbon monoxide detector decides to chirp and wake him anyway.

Someone must have been praying for my sanctification.  Stop it.

Just kidding. :]

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